Updates

I'm feeling better and in the mood to post again. I actually had salmanella poisoning... I ate at a restaurant in town and had a salad that had crumbled up hard boiled egg on it. It must have been the culprit. What a painful experience, I won't be eating at that establishment again. Eva has been slowly ungluing herself from me. Spending the night in the hospital--my first night ever away from her--caused her to regress a little in her attaching. She won't let me out of her sight. Eva did really good though, she spent the day with me sitting in the Doctor's office without fussing or getting into trouble, and I was in so much pain and the pain meds caused me to drift in and out of sleep that I wasn't really that good at watching her. My mom was with me and Eva just sat and watched me. It upset her a lot and she was very worried that I needed help. Then, when David carried her out of the hospital, leaving me behind, she screamed the entire way and going home. And since then, she's been glued to me. I had a post-visit with the surgeon on Thursday, and as soon as Eva and I walked into the clinic, Eva started insisting very loudly "No. Wrong way mommy. Go back, Go back." She wasn't about to go through that again. Last night, as she was falling asleep, she was almost asleep when I hear a voice saying, "Mommy always come back." I assured her that I do and then she sighed and fell asleep. I am hoping she has worked out things in her brain and won't need to be attached to my hip so much now. It hasn't been this bad since last fall.

The weekend before I went to the hospital, Eva and I had an interesting conversation. Eva likes to watch the videos of when we went to China to get her, and lately she has been especially keen to watch the one of the first time we saw her and held her. She likes to tell you "Mommy and Baba happy." Well we were watching it and she noticed Eva was not happy. So we talked about it and the fact that Eva was sad because she didn't know mommy and baba yet. The next two days and night she cried a lot, and for unrelated things. Riding in the car seat, we look back to see tears silently coming down her face. At night she kept waking up half way and crying "my mommy" just to be calmed down when I stroked her back. So, on Sunday before my sojourn to the hospital, Eva and I were sitting on the bed and Eva said "China movies" I asked her if she wanted to watch the china movies again. She said "E'ah sad." I replied, "Yes, Eva was sad when she first came to live with Mommy and Baba because she had to leave her friends, but Mommy and Baba were very happy because we love Eva." After I said that, she insisted, "No. E'ah not sad. E'ah happy now." She must have worked something through, another piece of the loss puzzle, because she figured out in her own little head that she's not sad anymore. I was very proud of her. Unfortunately, a couple days latter, I ended up in the hospital and she was sad again.

Family are coming to visit us...tomorrow they should be here. Both my sisters and my niece and nephews are spending the 4th of July at our place this year. I'm very excited about it and Eva has been learning her cousin's names. She knows Aunt Kathy really well because she's in the pictures from China that Eva has memorized. It'll be fun...