Friday, November 17, 2006
Eva, Sweety
This morning in class, one of my students was joking with another student and in their "pretend" insulting told him, "You're adopted, no one loves you." I stopped my class, told him I didn't appreciate what he said and made him apologize for his statement. Then I told him that my daughter was adopted. It just made me realize how ingrained in our society is the negative image associated with "being adopted." The fact that it was natural to him to connect being adopted with not being loved disturbed me greatly. How do I insulate my daughter from this pervasive thinking, when it is so ingrained that it's even part of a casual joke? When a person adopts, they confirm over and over again that they want that child. It is an extremely difficult process that requires an amazing amount of love for a child who is unknown in many ways. The only way that one can actually survive the process is to love. I guess I am just going to have to educate this entire world on the subject one person at a time.
Last weekend, Eva was carrying around a can of vegetables (she packs everything around) and she dropped it on her big toe, cutting the skin next to the toenail. There was blood everywhere. Eva was very concerned about it, and insisted on being comforted by her mama. (Yea for attachment) I cleaned the cut, gave her some motrin and put a bandaid on it and told her that she would feel better. She did, until her bandaid fell off. She cried again, until I put another bandaid on. Mama discovered in the process that bandaids apparantly have magical powers, heretofore, unknown and undiscovered. Oh my word, did that make all the difference. Bandaid off = hurts, bandaid on = all better. It was cute.
Mrs. J's son has been sick all week, and so daycare has been closed. Eva stayed home with Granny this week. She's so cute and busy and delightful. She wants to wear her Panda Bear costume all the time and tries to dress herself in it, Granny lets her. When you ask her where something is, she shrugs her shoulders, puts her hands up in the air and says, "don't know." She can feed herself with her spoon, loves to carry around her blanket and check to see if her dolly has a wet diaper. Although, she hides from Granny when it's time for her diaper to be changed. She has recently discovered the doggy bone biscuits. Our dog has never had so many biscuits given to her... she really likes Eva. Seriously, Eva is feeding her about 12 a day now. We're going to have to go and buy more soon. She will help me unload the dishwasher and she repeats the last word of every sentence we say. I can't get over how fast she is growing. As quickly as she grows, so does her desire to test her mommy increase. It was a rough day last Friday.
I love her more than I thought was possible, and my heart melts everytime she grins up at me, or giggles, or hugs me, or pats my back, or gives me a kiss. Oh... and when she says "I love you" back to me, it is powerful.
Last weekend, Eva was carrying around a can of vegetables (she packs everything around) and she dropped it on her big toe, cutting the skin next to the toenail. There was blood everywhere. Eva was very concerned about it, and insisted on being comforted by her mama. (Yea for attachment) I cleaned the cut, gave her some motrin and put a bandaid on it and told her that she would feel better. She did, until her bandaid fell off. She cried again, until I put another bandaid on. Mama discovered in the process that bandaids apparantly have magical powers, heretofore, unknown and undiscovered. Oh my word, did that make all the difference. Bandaid off = hurts, bandaid on = all better. It was cute.
Mrs. J's son has been sick all week, and so daycare has been closed. Eva stayed home with Granny this week. She's so cute and busy and delightful. She wants to wear her Panda Bear costume all the time and tries to dress herself in it, Granny lets her. When you ask her where something is, she shrugs her shoulders, puts her hands up in the air and says, "don't know." She can feed herself with her spoon, loves to carry around her blanket and check to see if her dolly has a wet diaper. Although, she hides from Granny when it's time for her diaper to be changed. She has recently discovered the doggy bone biscuits. Our dog has never had so many biscuits given to her... she really likes Eva. Seriously, Eva is feeding her about 12 a day now. We're going to have to go and buy more soon. She will help me unload the dishwasher and she repeats the last word of every sentence we say. I can't get over how fast she is growing. As quickly as she grows, so does her desire to test her mommy increase. It was a rough day last Friday.
I love her more than I thought was possible, and my heart melts everytime she grins up at me, or giggles, or hugs me, or pats my back, or gives me a kiss. Oh... and when she says "I love you" back to me, it is powerful.
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Busy Girl
Eva is at the age that she is constantly busy. She plays with the cats, reads herself books (gets upset when mama wants to look at every page and has to take over herself), talks on the phone (she actually figured out the 5 button sequence required to call Mrs. J on the phone herself on Saturday), loves on her babies, re-decorates the house, packs things around, helps mama with whatever she is doing at the time, feeds herself and tries to dress herself. One of Eva's favorite things to do is play pretend. She especially likes to pretend to cook and make things for Granny, mommy and baba to eat. It is highly amusing to mama to see her pretend to take a bite of air.
Monday, November 06, 2006
Friday, November 03, 2006
Thursday, November 02, 2006
Partying panda
Granny made this costume for Eva. Eva liked it, she even left her hat on for the longest time.
Eva enjoyed a fun day on the 31st of October. She had a party at daycare and then in the evening we took her to Halleluyah Night at our Church. It was fun, she got to eat hotdogs, dance and play some games. I was making balloon animals, and Eva thought that all the display balloons were hers... she insisted on carrying them around all at once... her arms were very full. She did fine, until some adults who I didn't recognize showed up in scary, dark, witch costumes. Eva studied them for a couple of minutes and then hid behind David... she got her little body squeezed in between his chair and the wall. She's never seen a witch before, so she must have been responding to the darkness of the costume and make-up. She definitely didn't like it. Finally we got her home late, just for her to wake up at 5:00 a.m. again. Really, this girl does not handle time changes well.
So, twice before I have given Eva chocolate and both times it caused her to have diareah. In her partying tuesday, she consumed more chocolate than she ever has before. On Wednesday (yesterday), I noticed that she has a rash all over her body. There aren't any pustules, just red, flat blotchy spots that are mostly on her belly and back. I'm pretty sure that Eva is allergic to chocolate. Tell me, how do you explain that to a 1 1/2 year old?!
Monday, October 30, 2006
Milestones
This weekend was Eva's first ever daylight savings time change. I had a conversation with her on Saturday afternoon about how daylight savings time was ending for the year, and that meant we got an extra hour of sleep this weekend. She responded, "BaBa dawoo kitty cat no no bawk bawk mama," Which I, of course, translated as, "Yes mother, I understand and I will enjoy sleeping in late on Sunday. It will be my pleasure to ensure you get your hour of extra sleep." Yeah... at 5:00 in the morning on Sunday, I laid in bed while my daughter simultaneously bounced on my stomach, giggled and instructed me on the exact location of my nose, and I contemplated many life lessons. I wonder how old she will be before she enjoys sleeping in also...
On Saturday, this weekend, David and I went out by ourselves for the first time since we got Eva. It was weird. David said that he kept looking in the back seat expecting to see her in her car seat... she wasn't. Granny was the babysitter. She was very proud of herself because she got Eva to sleep (she fell asleep while Granny read her stories) within 30 minutes of us leaving the house, then she put her on her matt on the floor. David and I intended to put her in the crib when we got home. After Eva had slept for nearly three hours, our cat Ginger decided she needed to go and lick on Eva's face. Yeah... it woke her up. Eva is irrational when she is woken up and so when I called at 8:45, she was screaming in the background. We came home early. Next time, the cats go outside, even if it is cold. It took us until 11:30 to get her back to sleep. Which is partly what I contemplated as I laid in bed awake at 5:00 a.m.
Despite the lack of sleep, Sunday was a great day for us. Eva had her dedication. It was a beautiful and spiritual day. Eva slept through the first part of it, but then woke up during the prophetic words. I made a video of when we first got Eva in China and the dance team at our church learned how to dance with traditional Chinese fans to accompany the video. It was amazing. In any case, Eva watched it all avidly. When the first picture of her BaBa came on the screen, she yelled out "Baba" so everyone could hear... it was very cute. I ended up holding her for about 2 hours straight through on Sunday... She's about 27 lbs now, and my arms ache like they haven't hurt in years. It was worth it.
Another big change in Eva's life...she has moved up diaper size from #4 Huggies to #5. For some reason, that fact makes me feel a little sad, or maybe I am just emotional due to the 5:00 a.m. wake up call. In either case, she is growing up fast.
Some of you will fully appreciate the significance of this last milestone, others not so much. But, for the last couple of weeks Eva has started leaning into me every time she sits next to me on the chair. And, when I hold her, she will mold her body into mine every single time now. I am thrilled at the level of attachment this little girl has built towards us. At the same time, I am feeling the responsibility of a motherhood on my life for her. I still think this is the best gig going... despite the missing sleep.
On Saturday, this weekend, David and I went out by ourselves for the first time since we got Eva. It was weird. David said that he kept looking in the back seat expecting to see her in her car seat... she wasn't. Granny was the babysitter. She was very proud of herself because she got Eva to sleep (she fell asleep while Granny read her stories) within 30 minutes of us leaving the house, then she put her on her matt on the floor. David and I intended to put her in the crib when we got home. After Eva had slept for nearly three hours, our cat Ginger decided she needed to go and lick on Eva's face. Yeah... it woke her up. Eva is irrational when she is woken up and so when I called at 8:45, she was screaming in the background. We came home early. Next time, the cats go outside, even if it is cold. It took us until 11:30 to get her back to sleep. Which is partly what I contemplated as I laid in bed awake at 5:00 a.m.
Despite the lack of sleep, Sunday was a great day for us. Eva had her dedication. It was a beautiful and spiritual day. Eva slept through the first part of it, but then woke up during the prophetic words. I made a video of when we first got Eva in China and the dance team at our church learned how to dance with traditional Chinese fans to accompany the video. It was amazing. In any case, Eva watched it all avidly. When the first picture of her BaBa came on the screen, she yelled out "Baba" so everyone could hear... it was very cute. I ended up holding her for about 2 hours straight through on Sunday... She's about 27 lbs now, and my arms ache like they haven't hurt in years. It was worth it.
Another big change in Eva's life...she has moved up diaper size from #4 Huggies to #5. For some reason, that fact makes me feel a little sad, or maybe I am just emotional due to the 5:00 a.m. wake up call. In either case, she is growing up fast.
Some of you will fully appreciate the significance of this last milestone, others not so much. But, for the last couple of weeks Eva has started leaning into me every time she sits next to me on the chair. And, when I hold her, she will mold her body into mine every single time now. I am thrilled at the level of attachment this little girl has built towards us. At the same time, I am feeling the responsibility of a motherhood on my life for her. I still think this is the best gig going... despite the missing sleep.
Thursday, October 26, 2006
18 months old
Eva is 18 months old today. I am hoping that her increased level of "getting into things," and the increased fits that she is throwing is typical of her age and that my daughter isn't just spoiled. It does help when she communicates what she wants. This morning, she saw one of her stuffed animals behind the couch and started fussing. I asked her what she wanted and she grabbed my hand and put it behind the couch. After I reached down and got the animal, she was happy, and no more fussing. I love it when she communicates with me, I think she loves it when I understand what she wants so she doesn't have to throw a fit about it.
At 18 months old, Eva really is very good at lots of things. She actually talks on the phone with Granny and with David. It's just jibberish, but she makes actual sounds instead of just standing there and listening or shaking her head. She loves to use Granny's computer, she knows all about how remotes work and how the dishwasher works and how to put on her shoes. She thinks she knows more than she does, but it's cute nonetheless.
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
Playing with Dolls
Eva is at the age that she wants to dress everything around her: herself, her dolls, mommy. Her particular favorite is putting her shoes on everyone else's feet and daddy's shoes on her feet.
Saturday, October 21, 2006
Adventure in the big city
My Volvo is about just short of 50,000 miles, which is when the full bumper to bumper warrenty wears off. So, David and I took opportunity of the fact that the college was closed on Thursday and Friday this week to drive down to the Volvo dealer in The Twin Cities and get it's maintenance done. Eva went with us.
With the rush hour traffic that we encountered in Minneapolis, the drive down took just over 6 hours. Since I get motion sickness in the back seat of my car, I drove and David rode in the back with Eva to serve as her personal car riding attendant. They played dollies... Eva claimed that her baby doll had a poopy diaper and made David change her underware and wipe her with a tissue. David kept her supplied with food and beverage, they danced, they watched a DVD, they read books and they colored, well, until Eva colored on the window, then they didn't color anymore. Eva slept only an hour of the trip. David said that at the end of it, he was just as exhausted as when he is the one driving. Sweety pie actually did well until about an hour before we got to the hotel, at that point the only thing David could do to keep her entertained was tickling her.
After we checked into the hotel, we went out to eat at a really good Chinese food restaurant. Eva had lots of fun flirting with all the people behind her. She always checks out the food that the people around her are eating and if it looks interesting to her, exclaims with loud "oohs" and "ahs." Eva did pack away half of the entire entre of chicken lo mein while exclaiming at the food around her. Lots of people told us what an adorable girl we have. We took leftovers back to the hotel with us. After having slammed her fingers in the drawer twice, investigating the entire room, and exlaiming over the art on the walls, Eva fell asleep looking at the pictures of her on the digital camera with me.
David and I were married 12 years before Eva came into our lives and have been a couple for a long time, gone on many trips together and stayed in lots of different hotels. As I layed in bed with Eva sleeping in between David and I, it sank home to me more powerfully than ever before that we're a family now, not just a couple. For many years, when we go on trips there will be another little person with us. It was an interesting thought for me because Eva didn't chose to go on the trip, she didn't have a say in it at her age, yet there she was with us, following her mommy and daddy wherever we go. Her life is completely entwined with ours and for some reason, the realization of that just finally came to me.
Eva woke up early the next morning and was excited to be in the hotel. She certainly is not afraid of new things anymore as long as David and I are there. We went out to breakfast, but Eva didn't eat very much. She doesn't like to eat in the morning. Instead, she had lots of fun exclaiming over the food of the people sitting around us. Then we had to wait for 3 hours at the dealer. Granted, they have a very nice waiting room with an entire little room for children. But, 3 hours is a long time. Eva played with the toys, helped mommy put together a puzzle of the United states (I don't know if you all realize it, but it turns out Pennsylvania borders Calfiornia and Idaho the Mexican border, Minnesota belongs next to Maine and Oregon above Florida.) Sweety pie also greeted everyone who came into the waiting room and showed them her dolly, including the fact that she can pull her underware off and check that she has a clean "diaper." David had a soda and, I don't know why, decided to give Eva her first taste of pop. She liked it. When mommy had a drink and wouldn't share it, she got very upset. In the middle of begging for some of mommy's soda, one of the men who work at the dealership came in and got himself one. Eva followed him over to the machine and watched him get his soda. She then proceeded to beg him for a drink... I told her she couldn't have any of his either.
After our car was done we went to a large Asian market in Minneapolis. We bought some things and a bag of assorted cakes for Eva and daddy. Then we went to the Mall of America just so Eva could walk off some of her energy before starting the long drive home. Now, I didn't want Eva walking off on me at the mall without me knowing it, so I put her in squeaky shoes for this day of adventure in the big city. When Eva wears her squeaky shoes up here in our small town, it really isn't that big of a deal. People notice, but since there aren't a lot of people anywhere, it doesn't really matter much. I had no idea how much attention those shoes would garner at the mall of America. Oh my gosh, EVERYONE looked, and said "are those her shoes?" followed by "She's adorable" or "She's so cute." I'm not sure it was a good idea or not, however, there is definitely no way that anyone was going to walk off with her... the entire mall would know where they went. I did see an older Caucasian woman with a Chinese girl about 10 years old. She noticed Eva (everyone did) and gave us the biggest smile. That was cool. Eva did some shopping. Well, she went into the stores and picked out what she wanted and then tried to walk out with it. David and I did buy her a couple of things. To my disgust, one of the items she picked out is a frilly, pink, stuffed kitty cat purse. Whatever...I will try not to twist her with my view of things "girly." Seriously though, ick.
On the drive home David fed Eva leftover Chicken lo mein and some of the Chinese cakes. She liked some of them. However, one of the cakes, David said tasted like communion wafers with jam stuck in between them. That one, Eva told David was trash and wouldn't eat it. She had fun playing with her toys on the way home... only we didn't anticipate that after dark she wouldn't be able to see them anymore, nor did she want to sleep. She screached at the top of her lungs for the last hour and a half of our trip (I timed it). Finally, two minutes before arriving home she fell asleep... so soundly asleep that I couldn't wake her up even when I tried. At least she woke up this morning happy. So, all said, Eva does travel well, she draws a lot of attention and it turns out that everyone in the entire Minneosta area believes she is adorable... we heard that a lot. I am glad to be home.
With the rush hour traffic that we encountered in Minneapolis, the drive down took just over 6 hours. Since I get motion sickness in the back seat of my car, I drove and David rode in the back with Eva to serve as her personal car riding attendant. They played dollies... Eva claimed that her baby doll had a poopy diaper and made David change her underware and wipe her with a tissue. David kept her supplied with food and beverage, they danced, they watched a DVD, they read books and they colored, well, until Eva colored on the window, then they didn't color anymore. Eva slept only an hour of the trip. David said that at the end of it, he was just as exhausted as when he is the one driving. Sweety pie actually did well until about an hour before we got to the hotel, at that point the only thing David could do to keep her entertained was tickling her.
After we checked into the hotel, we went out to eat at a really good Chinese food restaurant. Eva had lots of fun flirting with all the people behind her. She always checks out the food that the people around her are eating and if it looks interesting to her, exclaims with loud "oohs" and "ahs." Eva did pack away half of the entire entre of chicken lo mein while exclaiming at the food around her. Lots of people told us what an adorable girl we have. We took leftovers back to the hotel with us. After having slammed her fingers in the drawer twice, investigating the entire room, and exlaiming over the art on the walls, Eva fell asleep looking at the pictures of her on the digital camera with me.
David and I were married 12 years before Eva came into our lives and have been a couple for a long time, gone on many trips together and stayed in lots of different hotels. As I layed in bed with Eva sleeping in between David and I, it sank home to me more powerfully than ever before that we're a family now, not just a couple. For many years, when we go on trips there will be another little person with us. It was an interesting thought for me because Eva didn't chose to go on the trip, she didn't have a say in it at her age, yet there she was with us, following her mommy and daddy wherever we go. Her life is completely entwined with ours and for some reason, the realization of that just finally came to me.
Eva woke up early the next morning and was excited to be in the hotel. She certainly is not afraid of new things anymore as long as David and I are there. We went out to breakfast, but Eva didn't eat very much. She doesn't like to eat in the morning. Instead, she had lots of fun exclaiming over the food of the people sitting around us. Then we had to wait for 3 hours at the dealer. Granted, they have a very nice waiting room with an entire little room for children. But, 3 hours is a long time. Eva played with the toys, helped mommy put together a puzzle of the United states (I don't know if you all realize it, but it turns out Pennsylvania borders Calfiornia and Idaho the Mexican border, Minnesota belongs next to Maine and Oregon above Florida.) Sweety pie also greeted everyone who came into the waiting room and showed them her dolly, including the fact that she can pull her underware off and check that she has a clean "diaper." David had a soda and, I don't know why, decided to give Eva her first taste of pop. She liked it. When mommy had a drink and wouldn't share it, she got very upset. In the middle of begging for some of mommy's soda, one of the men who work at the dealership came in and got himself one. Eva followed him over to the machine and watched him get his soda. She then proceeded to beg him for a drink... I told her she couldn't have any of his either.
After our car was done we went to a large Asian market in Minneapolis. We bought some things and a bag of assorted cakes for Eva and daddy. Then we went to the Mall of America just so Eva could walk off some of her energy before starting the long drive home. Now, I didn't want Eva walking off on me at the mall without me knowing it, so I put her in squeaky shoes for this day of adventure in the big city. When Eva wears her squeaky shoes up here in our small town, it really isn't that big of a deal. People notice, but since there aren't a lot of people anywhere, it doesn't really matter much. I had no idea how much attention those shoes would garner at the mall of America. Oh my gosh, EVERYONE looked, and said "are those her shoes?" followed by "She's adorable" or "She's so cute." I'm not sure it was a good idea or not, however, there is definitely no way that anyone was going to walk off with her... the entire mall would know where they went. I did see an older Caucasian woman with a Chinese girl about 10 years old. She noticed Eva (everyone did) and gave us the biggest smile. That was cool. Eva did some shopping. Well, she went into the stores and picked out what she wanted and then tried to walk out with it. David and I did buy her a couple of things. To my disgust, one of the items she picked out is a frilly, pink, stuffed kitty cat purse. Whatever...I will try not to twist her with my view of things "girly." Seriously though, ick.
On the drive home David fed Eva leftover Chicken lo mein and some of the Chinese cakes. She liked some of them. However, one of the cakes, David said tasted like communion wafers with jam stuck in between them. That one, Eva told David was trash and wouldn't eat it. She had fun playing with her toys on the way home... only we didn't anticipate that after dark she wouldn't be able to see them anymore, nor did she want to sleep. She screached at the top of her lungs for the last hour and a half of our trip (I timed it). Finally, two minutes before arriving home she fell asleep... so soundly asleep that I couldn't wake her up even when I tried. At least she woke up this morning happy. So, all said, Eva does travel well, she draws a lot of attention and it turns out that everyone in the entire Minneosta area believes she is adorable... we heard that a lot. I am glad to be home.
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Superhero
Since becoming a mother, I have a new job description. It turns out that I am a superhero. I love being a superhero... this is a job that is hands down my absolute favorite and is worth every bit of tiredness and self-lessness that comes standard with a job of this nature.
Eva has been cutting her bottom molars... she is a tooth manufacturing machine. Anyway, she's been fussing during the night so we've had her in bed with David and I. It is amazing, she will wake up moaning and obviously in pain, find me, lay her head down on my chest, let me rub her back and magically the pain is all gone. She goes right back to sleep. A healing touch is one of my superhero powers.
Eva has this fuzzy, pink, princess phone. Yes, it is nausiating. In any case, she likes it and likes to talk on it. This morning, I heard a sound come out of the body of my darling little girl that obviously signaled the end of the Earth. I turned to look at her and I see her stumbling towards me with her phone cord wrapped around her leg. The ability to fix every problem on earth, even catastrophic ones, is another of my superhero powers.
Another power I have is the ability to open every known substance on earth, even those which aren't intended to be opened. This power I find highly amusing.
I know that the day will come that I lose my superhero powers, and when that day comes, it will be a loss that I will mourn. In the meantime, I am going to fully enjoy my new job description.
Eva has been cutting her bottom molars... she is a tooth manufacturing machine. Anyway, she's been fussing during the night so we've had her in bed with David and I. It is amazing, she will wake up moaning and obviously in pain, find me, lay her head down on my chest, let me rub her back and magically the pain is all gone. She goes right back to sleep. A healing touch is one of my superhero powers.
Eva has this fuzzy, pink, princess phone. Yes, it is nausiating. In any case, she likes it and likes to talk on it. This morning, I heard a sound come out of the body of my darling little girl that obviously signaled the end of the Earth. I turned to look at her and I see her stumbling towards me with her phone cord wrapped around her leg. The ability to fix every problem on earth, even catastrophic ones, is another of my superhero powers.
Another power I have is the ability to open every known substance on earth, even those which aren't intended to be opened. This power I find highly amusing.
I know that the day will come that I lose my superhero powers, and when that day comes, it will be a loss that I will mourn. In the meantime, I am going to fully enjoy my new job description.
Thursday, October 12, 2006
Sweater girl
Eva is napping here in a sweater vest that I knitted for her during the long wait. Eva loves her sweaters and wants to wear them all the time, even though sweat pours out of her head because she's too hot. In the pictures we were given of Eva while living in the orphanage, she was very overdressed, lots of layers and sweaters and coats. It is a cultural aspect of the Chinese as they make sure their babies are warm (i.e. very hot). When we adopted Eva and brought her out of China, we had to accept the fact that she will lose much of her culture from China. It is a delight to me to see what culture she did absorb in that first year of her life that she will carry with her. I think she'll always be a "sweater girl."
We got snow last night, and Granny and I were delighted this morning to see Eva's reaction. I let her touch the snow on the car bumper. She frowned and shook it off quicker than it could melt. I asked her if she wanted to touch it again... she looked at me and said, emphatically, "no." Sigh...
Friday, October 06, 2006
Chinese Moon Festival
I almost forgot to mention it... today is the Chinese moon festival. The moon festival falls on the 15th day of the 8th Lunar month. It is a day to give thanks and to remember the people important in our lives, especially our family. On this day, we remembered to say a prayer for Eva's birth parents. I think about them a lot... I wonder if they also have gotten together on this day and if they think about the little girl who is lost to them. I believe that her loss must be a wound carried by her birth mother that will never completely heal. I pray that somehow she knows the little girl she loved enough to give life to is safe, happy and adored...that she has a mommy and a daddy and a family here in America who love her unconditionally and who spent some time tonight looking at the moon and thinking about them.
"Sit"
I've been reading about using positive re-inforcement to teach obedience to commands, etc. I read a suggestion of using a treat to reward immediate response to simple commands to re-inforce and teach the wanted behavior. I thought, okay... Eva has issues with following some commands like "come" and especially the "sit" command, I'll give it a try. Eva likes to stand precariously on chairs and three legged stools and any other inappropriate thing she can find. So, I have some fruit flavored candy treats that Eva likes but doesn't get very often... I got them out and waited for her to stand up on a chair again. I didn't have to wait long, walked over and stood next to her and told her to sit. She didn't so I tapped her on the knee and said sit again... she sat and I gave her a treat. Well...that was good, according to Eva but not good enough to keep from standing again. I didn't have to wait long to try my command again, I said "sit." And she sat... very quickly. I gave her a treat. Now, Eva is not a mentally slow child. She looked at me, looked at the treats and stood up. I said again, "sit," She immediately plopped herself down and opened her mouth. I gave her a treat. The second she was finished chewing it, she scrambled up again. I said "sit," and she sat and opened her mouth. Okay, I'm not such a slouch either on figuring things out, and I had figured out by this time that my sweet and beautiful daughter had learned how to play the system and get herself a treat. Needless to say, the next time she stood up and sat down, she didn't get the candy. To be fair, the technique did work... it did get Eva to sit down quickly. Only, I'm not sure it counts due to the fact that it also encouraged her to miss-behave along with encouraging her to behave.
Eva has gotten better at the "sit" command. However, I have had more success with consistancy, applause (good behavior recognition), and chair removal (unwanted consequences) than I did with the candy.
Eva has gotten better at the "sit" command. However, I have had more success with consistancy, applause (good behavior recognition), and chair removal (unwanted consequences) than I did with the candy.
Thursday, October 05, 2006
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Random thoughts
The other day, I was sitting on the bottom step of our stairs talking on the phone. Eva came up behind me and sat on the next step up. She then gave me a hug, rubbed my arms like I do hers when I give her a massage, and then poked her head around my side and cheerfully chirped, "Hi." I had to pause in my conversation and just experience the unexpected emotions it created in me. I didn't realize how incredible it was to have my daughter spontaneously give me affection, or how amazing it is to realize that I matter more than anything to that little girl. That's my little girl who three months ago did not like to be touched or kissed. She initiates it now and I love it.
I did not know it was possible before Eva came into our lives for anyone on this planet to be as completely adorable and wonderful as my daughter is (just a little biased... I realize it, but refuse to apologize for it). She amazes me every single day. She definitely benefits from having a live-in Granny. She and Granny play pretend a lot. Eva enjoys it a lot. Granny tells Eva that her toes look wonderful, and Eva pretends to give her one to eat. Granny has taught Eva to knock on the door of her little people houses and then when you open them to say "Hi" and when you close them to say "Goodbye." Eva loves to knock on all the doors in the house now whether there is someone behind them or not. Granny makes Eva say "ah" before she will give her food, because Eva stuffs her cheeks and then gets so much food in her mouth she gags on it. Well, now, Eva goes up to Granny and demands Granny go "ah." When she does, she shoves something she has found somewhere into Grannies mouth. It is rather gross, but cute none-the-less. When Eva colors a picture, we put it in a binder of her artwork, encased in plastic sheet protectors. Eva loves to look at her art, and will make "oohing" and "ahing" sounds as she does it. Eva is her own best fan... okay she has to compete with the rest of us for that title. She is just imitating us, but it is very cute. By the way, the Arctic Cat Green crayon is her favorite... honestly, David didn't even train her to like it. She loves to pack things, she crawls under the chairs and tables, thinks it's a fun game to grab the remote and run as fast as her legs will carry her. Eva has learned how to drink out of a straw, she loves her sweaters and wants to wear them all the time even though sweat poors out of her head because she's too hot. She thinks she knows where things should be put and she loves food.
Eva is doing very well with daycare anymore... It is nothing like the beginning. Mrs. J told me the other day that Eva is the mother of her group. She will follow Mrs. J around the kitchen as she prepares lunch, she helps pick up things and put things away. The only thing I have to deal with now, is that this sadness that I sometimes feel because I am not spending every moment of every day with my sweet little girl.
I did not know it was possible before Eva came into our lives for anyone on this planet to be as completely adorable and wonderful as my daughter is (just a little biased... I realize it, but refuse to apologize for it). She amazes me every single day. She definitely benefits from having a live-in Granny. She and Granny play pretend a lot. Eva enjoys it a lot. Granny tells Eva that her toes look wonderful, and Eva pretends to give her one to eat. Granny has taught Eva to knock on the door of her little people houses and then when you open them to say "Hi" and when you close them to say "Goodbye." Eva loves to knock on all the doors in the house now whether there is someone behind them or not. Granny makes Eva say "ah" before she will give her food, because Eva stuffs her cheeks and then gets so much food in her mouth she gags on it. Well, now, Eva goes up to Granny and demands Granny go "ah." When she does, she shoves something she has found somewhere into Grannies mouth. It is rather gross, but cute none-the-less. When Eva colors a picture, we put it in a binder of her artwork, encased in plastic sheet protectors. Eva loves to look at her art, and will make "oohing" and "ahing" sounds as she does it. Eva is her own best fan... okay she has to compete with the rest of us for that title. She is just imitating us, but it is very cute. By the way, the Arctic Cat Green crayon is her favorite... honestly, David didn't even train her to like it. She loves to pack things, she crawls under the chairs and tables, thinks it's a fun game to grab the remote and run as fast as her legs will carry her. Eva has learned how to drink out of a straw, she loves her sweaters and wants to wear them all the time even though sweat poors out of her head because she's too hot. She thinks she knows where things should be put and she loves food.
Eva is doing very well with daycare anymore... It is nothing like the beginning. Mrs. J told me the other day that Eva is the mother of her group. She will follow Mrs. J around the kitchen as she prepares lunch, she helps pick up things and put things away. The only thing I have to deal with now, is that this sadness that I sometimes feel because I am not spending every moment of every day with my sweet little girl.
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